Things that make me smile

My mom gave me this bamboo when it got too tall for her apartment. A tiny side sprout on it fell off within a month at my house. Made me so sad. A few weeks later, another baby grew in its place. This is said baby sprout, growing and growing. Every time I see it, it makes me happy. I helped create life!! Haha, I'm so dramatic, I know, but seriously, it feels good to be able to do that. Now, if I could only do something about the spindly geranium in my kitchen that hasn't seen a flower since I brought it home from the greenhouse ...



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I'm so geeked out about this ...

Writing again ... grateful ... <3

And now back to our regularly scheduled programming

Wow. That was pretty severe. Yes, I have those moments. You all know that. Little miss toughie tough crumbles a bit from time to time and just has to get it out. Well, it's out.

I've been listening to Florence on repeat a few days now. It's amazing how Dog Days Are Over (posted earlier) makes it impossible for me to sit still (I just have to dance or at least bust a shoulder move in the car) and makes my heart soar, while this song impels me to find the nearest heavy bag and pound until my fists are bloody or lace up the runners and hit the hills and never come back. She's an amazing writer and it's such a gift she has to be able to trigger such strong emotions, well, at least in me.

I think at times we've all felt heavy in someone's arms before. Like our love is a burden and not a gift. I'm learning, slowly but surely, that a) the trick is to just be true to your heart, be patient, and try to love without expectation or judgment for the sake of love itself and b) I prolly shouldn't listen to this song while drinking Malbec. :)

Peace, people, and oh yeah, love. <3

Yup.

You ever want to scream? Just fucking scream? Yup. my love has concrete feet ...

4 days later ...

What I wouldn't give to go back and have my only thoughts be about how soothing the sun's rays are on my skin and how soft the sand feels against my bare belly; the only sounds are the waves crashing on the rocks and the skaters' wheels cracking the concrete when they make a trick; the only smells are the salty air and hamburgers from the cafe. It only took four days for the heavy weight of reality to come smacking back down on me. And I'm pretty sure she's been pigging out on snickers bars and French bread in my absence. Why else would she feel so much heavier?

Trying to think happy thoughts ...

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